apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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