no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I think your dad took our porno
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
