My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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