Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
