Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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