the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
