JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
this boner is exhausting
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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