i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
The Olympian is in my bed
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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