I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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