Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs

  (314): View more from Missouri

  you don't even go to loyola anymore

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  (504): loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs (314): you don't even go to loyola anymore http://tfl.nu/fisu
  Replies (45) Good night (7965) Bad night (922)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  Is my tampon string too long for this dress?

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  (709): Is my tampon string too long for this dress? http://tfl.nu/pjcs
  Replies (54) Good night (1118) Bad night (6589)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.

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  (407): He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy. http://tfl.nu/rtg1
  Replies (41) Good night (1907) Bad night (8293)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?

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  (330): not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up? http://tfl.nu/smja
  Replies (6) Good night (1193) Bad night (3036)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.

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  (727): don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday. http://tfl.nu/jjm9
  Replies (7) Good night (1963) Bad night (735)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.

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  (973): I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian. http://tfl.nu/8wfu
  Replies (10) Good night (2061) Bad night (569)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.

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  (603): I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST. http://tfl.nu/xkvr
  Replies (22) Good night (2009) Bad night (541)
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  (867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

  We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.

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  (867): We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/l33f
  Replies (4) Good night (964) Bad night (479)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.

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  (506): Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second. http://tfl.nu/am2u
  Replies (1) Good night (1294) Bad night (753)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  I'm going through a really dark time right now

  (214): View more from Texas

  I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up

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  (469): I'm going through a really dark time right now (214): I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up http://tfl.nu/zlw3
  Replies (5) Good night (645) Bad night (1529)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.

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  (570): If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it. http://tfl.nu/cvsi
  Replies (3) Good night (849) Bad night (375)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.

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  (307): I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it. http://tfl.nu/nkno
  Replies (4) Good night (353) Bad night (970)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...

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  (520): His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it... http://tfl.nu/6yoy
  Replies (2) Good night (520) Bad night (366)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup

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  (403): i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup http://tfl.nu/p8ne
  Replies (3) Good night (665) Bad night (345)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.

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  (610): Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college. http://tfl.nu/99u6
  Replies (2) Good night (1323) Bad night (328)

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