The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
