Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize