it wasn't lemon gatorade
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob