He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
