I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
my poor anus
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
