This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize