I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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