the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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