so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
