And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
