honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
