Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
