and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize