I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
