Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Two words: nipple clamps
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