Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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