hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize
