i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize