Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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