ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
