I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
FUCK WHALES
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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