i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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