I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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