I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
