It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
