Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
