id be glad to
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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