yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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