I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
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I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
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Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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