She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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