In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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