Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize