i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
