Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
