ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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