I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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