I want to stick my p in your. b.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
