Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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