no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
