So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
